Motherhood is not just a journey but actually a challenge for a woman. One should be completely ready for a roller coaster ride before thinking about becoming a mom.
“No woman can call herself free until she can choose consciously whether she will or will not be a mother.”
― Margaret Sanger
With a tiny little one in your arms, life completely changes for you. And the most difficult part of this journey of motherhood is , it doesn’t come with a manual to help but just a baby..
Before I became a mom…
Yes…the first challenge for me started right before I entered the labour room. I had to keep faith in God and believe in miracles. My EDD had passed and I was induced pain for contractions. I was all ready for a natural delivery when the announcement by the doctor that there is change in the heartbeat of the baby gave me shivers and I was shifted to OT for a C-sec and with my prayers I was able to hold a healthy baby in my arms.
Being a mother of a tiny one ..
The difficult phase began the same day and it continued for more than a month. Yes, Breastfeeding was truly a challenge to me. It all started with the first feeds . As I had a c-sec , so it was difficult for me to adjust my positions each time to feed my baby. I didn’t know how to feed and he didn’t know how to latch. Both were new in this field. Still managed. After a few days, I had learned how to feed but my son couldn’t learn how to latch. He used to cry sometimes for even five long minutes before he could latch. It was difficult for everybody at home to see such a small baby crying at top of his voice.
My Mil (who is otherwise a wonderful lady) concluded that I don’t have proper milk supply and so my baby was crying out of hunger. So we gave him top feed 2-3 times. But then , I could feel my breasts full, heavy and leaking. So I decided, that even if I have to see my son crying (can be awarded as the worst mom, but that was for my baby) , he will not be given top feed. It took around a month or more for my son to learn how to latch. But, he gradually learned it.
Then, came the phase of trusting your intuitions. I had no one around me , when my son turned 6 months, other that a set of new moms like me (on whatsapp ) along with mom and mom in law (over the phone). I was supposed to start solids for him , but didn’t know how and with what. All I heard was my inner voice strengthening me and guiding me at every minute for this. I never knew about this hidden treasure that I have. This power of intuition made me win this challenge of understanding what is good for my baby.
With this came in another challenge of saying complete NO to a lot of advices , especially when they came from the people closest to my heart. I got a lot of advice to start top feed for him once he turned 1. I had decided when I have a proper supply , I will continue for at least an year or till the time baby is not ready for it. Yes, I had to fight the world for my baby.
Another challenge was to take the family along. I could feel that I was more of a mother now than a daughter or a wife. But then a good support from the partner cannot let you lose hope. He understood me well and accepted the fact that priorities do change with a new member in the family.
Raising a toddler…
I always thought that this phase will be easy as things will be easy to interpret when my child learns to speak. But NO, this seems to be the hardest to me now. With my son being a peaceful one, I always thought that I won’t be facing the terrible twos with him. My son proved me wrong. Toddler tantrums are the most difficult things to handle. I sometimes handle them with lot of hugs and kisses but the other times these temper tantrums would have their bar raised so high that this mommy has to take a time out.
But I know more is yet to come. With the pace the new generation and the technology is growing, I really wish I am able to handle a teen well in this challenging journey of motherhood. I wish to raise a son who can make this world a better place to live in….
I am sure I will be able to face this phase well as motherhood is a strong word….